Tips for Resolving Conflicts, Conflict Resolution/Mediation
Think of a constructive way to deal with the situation before you speak.
Both people need to agree to ground
rules:
- No interrupting
- No name calling or put downs
- Speak for yourself, not for the other person
One person tells her/his view of the situation using I-messages.
Second person restates what the
problem is for the first person (Steps 3 and 4 are repeated with
the second person telling his/her view, and the first person restating.)
Both people suggest and list possible solutions.
Both agree on a resolution by choosing from list in step #5.
How did it go? What might work better next time?
AN "I" MESSAGE HAS FOUR PARTS:
- I feel . . . . . . . . (state the feeling)
- When you . . (describe the other person's behavior)
- Because . . . . . (describe the results of the other person's behavior)
- And I want . . (state what would correct the situation for you)
WAYS TO ACTIVELY LISTEN
- CLARIFY - get more information -- ask questions.
- RESTATE - say in your own words what you heard the other person say, including their feelings.
- ENCOURAGE - using neutral or nonthreatening words to help another person say more about the situation and how they feel.
For more information please call Community and Neighborhood Resources at 303-651-8444 or email Susan Spaulding at susan.spaulding@ci.longmont.co.us
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